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Loving Bravely by Alexandra H. Solomon, PhD

Loving Bravely by Alexandra H. Solomon, PhD

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A godsend to anyone searching for, but struggling to find, true love in their lives."
-Kristin Neff, PhD, author of Self-Compassion

"Empowering and compassionate, and its lessons are universal."
-Publishers Weekly


Real love starts with you . In order to attract a life partner and build a healthy intimate relationship, you must first become a good partner to yourself. This book offers twenty invaluable lessons that will help you explore and commit to your own emotional and psychological well-being so you can be ready, resilient, and confident in love.

Many of us enter into romantic relationships full of expectation and hope, only to be sorely disappointed by the realization that the partner we've selected is a flawed human being with their own neuroses, history, and desires. Most relationships end because one or both people haven't done the internal work necessary to develop self-awareness and take responsibility for their own experiences. We've all heard "You can't love anyone unless you love yourself," but amid life's distractions and the myth of perfect, romantic love, how exactly do you do that?

In Loving Bravely, psychologist, professor and relationship expert Alexandra H. Solomon introduces the idea of relational self-awareness, encouraging you to explore your personal history to gain an understanding of your own relational patterns, as well as your strengths and weaknesses in relationships. By doing so, you'll learn what relationships actually require, beyond the fairytale notions of romance. And by maintaining a steady but gentle focus on yourself, you'll build the best possible foundation for making a loving connection.

By understanding your past relationship experiences, cultivating a strong sense of self-awareness, and determining what it is you really want in a romantic partner-you'll be ready to find the healthy, lasting love your heart desires.

Alexandra H. Solomon, PhD, is on faculty in the Weinberg College of Arts and Sciences, and the School of Education and Social Policy at Northwestern University. She is a licensed clinical psychologist at The Family Institute at Northwestern University, and is on faculty at The Omega Institute. Her first book, Loving Bravely, was featured on The Today Show . She writes articles and chapters for leading academic journals and books in the field of marriage and family. She maintains a psychotherapy practice for individual adults and couples, teaches and trains marriage and family therapy graduate students, and teaches the internationally renowned undergraduate course, Building Loving and Lasting Relationships: Marriage 101." Solomon is a highly sought-after speaker who works with groups like the United States Military Academy at West Point, Microsoft, and the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy. She is frequently asked to talk about love, sex, and marriage for media outlets like O, The Oprah Magazine ; The Atlantic ; Vogue ; NPR; and Scientific American . She is an international speaker and teacher whose work has been featured on five continents. She lives in the Greater Chicago Area.

Mona D. Fishbane, PhD, is director of couple therapy training at the Chicago Center for Family Health, and a clinical psychologist in private practice. She is an AAMFT-approved supervisor, a member of the advisory board for the journal Family Process, and a long-term AFTA member, where she has served on the board. Fishbane lectures nationally and internationally, and has published numerous articles on couples therapy and neurobiology, as well as on intergenerational relationships. She has been the recipient of honors and fellowships, most recently a grant from the John Templeton Foundation. Fishbane's book, Loving with the Brain in Mind, is part of the Norton Series on interpersonal neurobiology.